Pet Peeves: Abusive men, Abusive women, people who get in relationships and try to change their partner. If they aren't what you want when you get them, then why do you continue to stay in the relationship? Seriously...especially women. I'm a woman, so I feel I can safely say that women have a tendency to do this way more than men. Why can't most women just be supportive? Yeah....I realize that if he wants to take your life savings and make a garage brewery you might have to intercede...or if he spends his days at strip clubs, drunk, stoned, or picking up other women...they sure I can see wanting him to change. But let's get real....if he was doing these things while he was with you before you married him or moved in with him...it's probably not going to change and you should wake up and get a life. Move on. It is what it is. However, it this behavior only begins after you marry him...(so you think) then you need to reflect on what's changed. Did you play the game and make him think he was getting a supermodel while you dated only for him to wake up next to someone who gained a hundred pounds, wears sweats 24/7, doesn't brush their teeth, shower or fix their hair? You can't do a man that way. I'm not saying you need to be "perfect" all the time...but don't turn into something you wouldn't want either.
Men...this goes for you too....don't wine and dine her and never let her see the real you until you say "I do"...seriously, it's just cruel. So you fart occassionally...still, leave the room and don't do it in front of guests. She's not your maid either. If you're both working then you both need to take care of the home. Equally...that includes cooking, cleaning, laundry, yard work, etc. Yes ladies you can help your man mow grass...and men you won't melt if your hands touch the dishwater. I promise.
I'm saving the sex discussion for the next blog. That's going to take some time.
As for my first statement...don't hurt the one you're suppose to love. If you feel the need to do that...the minute the urge hits you..seek help or get out of the relationship. You just don't click...move on where you can both be happy.
Your partner might be "sorry" and they will promise "it will never happen again"....It happens again, and again, and again and spills over to children...get out the first time. Move on. Otherwise you won't get the opportunity to know what life is all about. You'll be dead. Don't be stupid...walk away at the first signs. You know in your heart to get out. And don't let them convince you that you aren't good enough for anyone else. Of course you are.
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