Waiting watching

I stood perched at the attic window, surveying the vast forest. The darkness would soon blanket the earth and they would arrive shortly after. I feared them though I never really saw them. I bombarded the door with old memories and broken dreams and prepared myself for what was to come next.....

©2010

Steel wool and bubble poo

My 16 wk old boxer is quite the little adventurer and will eat damned near anything.  Seriously.  she managed to get under the sink and tear into a box of Brillo pads...didn't think she'd done anything more than shred a couple until she puked a ball of steel wool and blue soap along with whatever else she'd chewed up yesterday.  Now ...she's crapping blue and blowing bubbles out her butt...yeah...for real. 

The autumnal season toys with me.  I wake up to freezing temperatures and crank up the heat....by noon we need the air conditioner.  Winter is whispering in my ear...I don't like her cold breath touching me.  She is as death.  My bones ache, my body creaks as a rusty hinge....

Blah, blah blog

I'm rather ranting this morning on relationships though I don't know why.  It just crossed my mind.  Things I see so many do that seems so ridiculous to me. 
Anyway, It's nearly 8 a.m. eastern and my mind is just rambling as I sip my java, light another cigarette- I intend to quit, I really do.  I'm down to less than half a pack a day. 
I have plenty of "real" work to do here.  Graduate classes, presentations, research, writing for which to hopefully get paid....blah, blah, blah.  So, I'm off.....

Well.....

Ladies...men are going to look at other women.  Get over it.  He loves you but if you bitch at him for the way GOD made him....he'll tire of you pretty quickly.  Let him look.  Hell point out some hotties for him now and then.  Be open and honest with your man...it will go a long way.  My aunt taught me that "It's not where he gets his appetite as long as he comes home for dinner."   You look too...you know you do.  You see a well muscled man jogging or whatever and you're mouth begins to water.  Wish your man looked like that don't you?  So you're a hypocrite.  You want a more stable, happy home...be realistic.  You might be the tightest, hottest chick on the block...he's still going to look.  And if you have put on a few pounds, stopped wearing makeup and so on....don't get jealous, get yourself back.  You'll feel so much better.  Do it for yourself.  Yeah....you can do it with kids.  In fact, you Should do it especially if you have kids...show them a strong woman.  If you exude confidence....your family will be happier, your kids more successful....your man...more physical and willing to please.  Yeah..it's a game...so play it better than the other women. 
Just a word of advice...you're best friend is your man in a good relationship, because if he's a good man your best "girlfriend" wants him and will most likely try to get him.  If you're a big gal...you can still be sexy...confidence girls...confidence.  Don't let anyone tell you that you aren't what he needs.  He married you didn't he?  He tries.  He loves you....give him a little something besides a daily routine. 

Men Women and other Strange things

Pet Peeves:  Abusive men, Abusive women, people who get in relationships and try to change their partner.  If they aren't what you want when you get them, then why do you continue to stay in the relationship?  Seriously...especially women.  I'm a woman, so I feel I can safely say that women have a tendency to do this way more than men. Why can't most women just be supportive?  Yeah....I realize that if he wants to take your life savings and make a garage brewery you might have to intercede...or if he spends his days at strip clubs, drunk, stoned, or picking up other women...they sure I can see wanting him to change.  But let's get real....if he was doing these things while he was with you before you married him or moved in with him...it's probably not going to change and you should wake up and get a life.  Move on.  It is what it is.  However, it this behavior only begins after you marry him...(so you think) then you need to reflect on what's changed.  Did you play the game and make him think he was getting a supermodel while you dated only for him to wake up next to someone who gained a hundred pounds, wears sweats 24/7, doesn't brush their teeth, shower or fix their hair?  You can't do a man that way.  I'm not saying you need to be "perfect" all the time...but don't turn into something you wouldn't want either. 
Men...this goes for you too....don't wine and dine her and never let her see the real you until you say "I do"...seriously, it's just cruel.  So you fart occassionally...still, leave the room and don't do it in front of guests.  She's not your maid either.  If you're both working then you both need to take care of the home.  Equally...that includes cooking, cleaning, laundry, yard work, etc.  Yes ladies you can help your man mow grass...and men you won't melt if your hands touch the dishwater.  I promise. 
I'm saving the sex discussion for the next blog.  That's going to take some time.
As for my first statement...don't hurt the one you're suppose to love.  If you feel the need to do that...the minute the urge hits you..seek help or get out of the relationship.  You just don't click...move on where you can both be happy.
Your partner might be "sorry" and they will promise "it will never happen again"....It happens again, and again, and again and spills over to children...get out the first time.  Move on.  Otherwise you won't get the opportunity to know what life is all about.  You'll be dead.  Don't be stupid...walk away at the first signs.  You know in your heart to get out. And don't let them convince you that you aren't good enough for anyone else.  Of course you are.